Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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