How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
