All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
