so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
