not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
