apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
