I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize
