yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize
