So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
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