dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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