Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
