Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
She just used a chaser for red wine.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Randomize
