I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
