I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
there's paper in my vomit.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
