The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
