she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Randomize
