call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
