I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
