I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
