i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
