I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I love having hate sex.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
