I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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