Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
