you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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