i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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