Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
