my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
