Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
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