He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
