I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
