I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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