He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize
