Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
