so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
