it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Drunk is not a location!
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