dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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