i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
