Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
