I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
tell me about the fingering
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