I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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