I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
