Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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