New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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