I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
