i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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