Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
