I'm going to jail i love you
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
