We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
