we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
