Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
